15-May-08 Today is an historic day inasmuch as California repealed the ban on gay marriage, which translates into insisting that gay couples have full marriage rights, and no less. My home state joins its sister state Massachusetts, the countries of Spain, Canada, Denmark and a whole host of other "first world" countries that didn't fall into hell immediately when they granted equality to all of their citizens. While I have never been a fan of straight marriage, for all of its financial entanglements, pitfalls and the waste it causes in our society, I do not see why gay people should not have the same opportunity to condition their lives in this way if they choose. It was only a matter of time before we caught up to our progressive counterparts on this civil rights issue which does not affect anyone who doesn't want to be affected by it, but I'm embracing for a conservative backlash as this country's puritanical roots seems to haunt us every time we take a step foward. I'm delighted that one of my co-workers is entitled to having his marriage status reinstated with his partner of 18 years. They were among those who got married here in San Francisco during the window of time a few years ago when the city was issuing licenses to same-sex couples. I know still others who attempted to do the same thing and I am very happy for them and myself, should I decide, with my 40th birthday approaching, to formally propose to Josh. The only concern I would have are the financial ramifications due to my less than stellar history (not that I ever declared bankruptcy). It turns out that one of my fellow colleagues, Beth Teper, from my gay parenting activism, ended up celebrating the decision and getting on the front page of nytimes.com.

Josh and I have had a lovely couple of days so far visiting with his parents who are in the area for vacation. They will actually be staying with us this weekend, but this week they are in the wine country at a place that was recommended to them by Josh's uncle and where they visited 18 months ago before Josh and I had moved out here. Monday they passed by Josh's job and were able to have lunch with Rick and Josh.

On Tuesday Josh and I left work early and drove up to Healdsburg to see them at HAYDON Inn. The town is picturesque and similar in design as the town of Sonoma (it's in the same county). It was so similar in layout that Josh was convinced at one point that it was indeed the same town that we visited in January in the rain with my sister's family and my Mom and Joseph, but that square is much larger. Before dark Tuesday we managed to walk around the square to shop a little, amazed at how early everything closed in this sleepy town. We noticed in the square's center the varied different kinds of trees juxtaposed in an unlikely way -- palms, redwoods and probably eucalyptus. We squeezed in one wine tasting before a scrumptious dinner at a restaurant Jan and Fran patronized before. I forgot the name of it, but it was about a block off the square and the beer-batter green beans were one of the delectable highlights.

Then, with Rick, we five all hung out in the city after work on Wednesday. On the way into San Francisco, Jan and Fran went and took some pictures by the Golden Gate. Before it got too dark we drove up to Twin Peaks and rode down the windy part of Lombard Street, then parked at Pier 39 and saw the sea lions on the wharf. The key was getting in as much sight-seeing as possible before dark, which is well after 8pm these days. Yet the night would not be without its adventure, as we had a perilous squeeze between cable cars (one of them heading right for us) that caused Josh to have a lump in his throat and become his father's backseat driver. Thankfully, for once, it wasn't me who was doing the driving and receiving criticism by someone who admittedly doesn't like to drive. Indeed, I didn't get anything but vicarious blame for suggesting the particular sites that brought us to that intersection and the one-way street that Josh's father went completely through in the opposite direction. Talk about proximate cause! I don't mind being the scapegoat, though, because it was something memorable and when the drama was over, we had descended to a lovely site right by the city beach in front of Ghirardelli Square. Besides, I wasn't the one everyone on the street was yelling at about going the wrong way down the hill. At least if we would have crashed, it would have been a lovely night to do it. It was unusually warm in the city, especially for being right by the water. We eventually ate at the Crab House. It is a mediocre tourist trap that Josh and I had gone to with my mother and Alex a few years ago during Josh's first trip to California. It's on the second floor of Pier 39 with fantastic views and we managed to have perfect timing for a glorious sunset over the mountains of Marin and the Golden Gate. Josh's parents were kind enough to drive us back to the East Bay after dinner, so we got to show them our house for the first time, even though it was dark by then.

11-May-08 Yesterday Josh, Rick and I went with Sabina and Brooke for a lovely short hike to the park at Lake Chabot. It was lovely to be so close to home (practically our backyard) and to see there were boats and fishing and picnicing areas that are really a feast for the eyes. There are lots of nooks and crannies like that in the Bay Area, but this one is right over the hill.

9-May-08 Apparently Rick told a mutual friend that he was offended when I told him to "break a leg" tonight when he did his church play. I realize he's 14 years younger than me, but do I really have to explain every English colloquialism I use when I speak to people? English is my second language!

I finalized travel plans for pretty much everything I could squeeze into our schedules for the rest of the year, including Tahoe, Maui, Palm Springs and Josh's xmas visit to Rochester.

Once again had to warn Alex that her phone would be cut off if she did not text and call me more frequently. I also expect that our chat messages end with a "bye" or "good night". With her, the fluidity of chat does not work as I will be ignored for days and I have no assurance that she will see my messages on a shared computer. Moreover, she never acknowledges receipt of emails which very often have critical data in them.

6-May-08 The general May and April albums I uploaded included our trip last weekend to Saint Helena in Napa County. We tried to stop in Calistoga, but the Cinco de Mayo parade wasn't amenable to that. We went to three different wineries with our friends Robert and Dan from New York, who so appreciated the exquisite weather, rolling hills and mountains, flourishing foliage and my singing along to the divas from the ipod (in the car). I was so glad to show them how far from East 97th Street I've come, while still appreciating all that is New York and missing it. With Bob and Charlie we walked much further than we anticipated. I wish I had taken my own advice to wear comfortable shoes. At least we got what I think is a respectable shot of me to put as my new main web site photo.

2-May-08 Playing tour guide has been fun with so many recent visitors from the East Coast and Josh's parents are coming in a few weeks. My friend Dan Bocchino and his roommate Robert are here this week and we intend to go wine tasting this weekend, I missed Yankl from Brooklyn last week who was in the area, but did see Carol Henning. This weekend Bob & Charlie from Massachusetts are also here and staying with us one night for their layover to Hawaii, so it's been quite a whirlwind of people who wanted to see the unique things in town. I just feel like such a novice tour guide, even though I grew up here.