Category Archives: Memoriam

I Lost My Friend James Eldon Taylor, Jr. (March 15, 1964 – March 30, 2011)

My sweet friend Jim would probably kill me if he knew I was using his middle name here, but I know several people named Jim Taylor, so it always helped me to find him in my address book when I could search by his full name.

Today I received very sad news about Jim.  A mutual friend informed me that his body was found in his apartment in Brooklyn.

Jim was very successful for many years as a woman’s clothes designer.  He loved animals and had a beautiful penthouse in Queens for many years, as well as a home on Fire Island for a while.  He was a true Midwestern boy whose dreams came true when he moved to the City of New York.  I was glad to be his friend both when he was successful and then for many years when he had some medical setbacks, including some bad seizures. As a result, he became quite destitute, but still stayed in the adopted city he loved so much, and it was during those tough times that I remember having the most laughs and the most fun while hanging out with him, including at many of the parties that I had in Brooklyn.  He loved making friends and was great with staying in touch with me, even when I moved back to California.  He told me many times that he would have loved to visit, and I was beckoning him to do it, so he could at least get away from the city for a while, during the tougher times he had.

I’m so glad I told Jim I loved him on more than one occasion, even when he drove me a little crazy.

The more I think about it, the more I realize my Mom is right that someone with this kind of medical history, really should not be living alone, because if he had a seizure, it is very likely that he could have survived.

Jim’s mother apparently died three years ago, which I did not know until this week, and his father, from whom he was apparently estranged, is not willing to pay for his cremation, which means that Jim might end up in the notorious New York city grave for John Doe’s known as Potter’s Field.  I hope this won’t be the case.  He deserved better.

RIP Lena Horne

I was on one of her email fan lists for years and I remember what an impression she made on me when she appeared on the Cosby Show.  I wasn’t fully familiar with her accomplishments at the time, but talk about a class act and a decent, long life.  I’ve thought about her often in recent years and knew that she was no young whippersnapper.  I listen to her regularly on my Ipod, and I know what an inspiration she was to many.  What a gorgeous, amazing, talented lady.

RIP Gene Baugh

You were my friend with whom I had so much in common for so many years. You were a rock. I can’t believe this.

Just got terrible news about losing one of my closest gaydad friends in the world, Gene Baugh, in Columbus, who raised his five kids.  I read his autobiography, although I don’t think it was ever published.  He was a huge fan of the Spanish language and had spent time in Spain in his youth.  I flew to Columbus to be in his marriage to a man in 1998, and he and I also spent time together at various gay parenting conventions around the country.  We originally met in 1996 in Minneapolis and stayed in touch quite regularly the whole time, sharing the drama of our kids and our lives before and after coming out.  He was only 56, and a big bear of a man (also very tall).

His daughter, Ruth, who lives on the West Coast now, as I do, went with my daughter and me to our first Provincetown Family Week.  Ruth and I recently got back in touch with each other and today she emailed me with the news that he had been taken off life support as he had requested be done if he should ever be in this state.  He had a stroke on Friday.