All posts by Joseph Hayden
Vallejo Victorian Home Tour 2025
Highlights from the Madhatter Vallejo Victorian Home Tour:
After the Vallejo Victorian Home Tour, we always end up at a reception at Vino Godfather’s Winery on Mare Island. It was wonderful to spend some quality time with Shun. I actually met Shun on this home tour (we calculated) three years ago! For the second year in a row, I ran into Anne Carr too! I love the architectural details of this establishment, which used to be an officer’s quarters, much like the coffee shop next door called Quarters.
Golden Girls Live in San Francisco
A bunch of Vallejoans took a hired bus to go to dinner in the Fisherman’s Wharf area and then attend the Golden Girls Live show en masse. It was a wonderful and well-planned experience that Shea and I got to do with many of our friends from the Vallejo Gay Network and allies. Thanks a million to Manny and Wendell for arranging it!
The weather was actually warmer than expected since it was a little blistery in Vallejo. Usually it’s the opposite!
It was altogether a lovely evening. However, it was a nail-biter whether we’d make it through downtown traffic to the Curran Theater on time; we disembarked at 7:31 pm for the 7:30 pm show. Fortunately, I heard the theater staff mention on the walkie-talkie to hold on for a few minutes. The lobby was still crowded with attendees, so we didn’t miss anything.
My Vallejo Weekly Debut
I think I’ve made my Vallejo Weekly debut! It’s not the clearest photo, but some of us from the Madhatter Parade are in one of the pictures in this “centerfold.” This city-issued magazine is released every Thursday, and it’s always got great content! I’m very proud that Vallejo has such a great newsletter. In the first picture, I’m the elf on the left. It’s sort of a profile, which I can tell because my “elf shoes” were practically falling off my Sketchers.
Foster Ella insisted on a Bath
AI-enhanced pictures of Mom
AI Magic with Grandmother
More AI “magic” brings me to the verge of tears. This enhanced photo with AI is my biological grandmother and me, taken in April 1969 in Salinas, California. I believe I only met her that one time. There are no other pictures of her and me together, not even from that day. It was only a few years ago, while looking through my late uncle’s photos, that I found this unenhanced photo of us. She died from smoking at age 50, so she never got to meet either of my siblings. I enhanced the photo and wondered what she and I would do if a movie were made out of it. Unlike the photo of my dad and me, she KISSES me! I’m actually glad my dad did NOT kiss me at such close proximity in that one photo, as that would be weird. I was 17 when my dad admitted, after a verbal slip-up, that the grandmother I knew was a step-grandmother and that this woman in this photo existed. Tobacco robbed me of a life of knowing her, just as tobacco robbed my daughter of a life with my father (her grandfather). At least I can cherish a kiss from her now.
Pomchi Puppies Marked Safe!
I know we can’t all take in every animal that is brought to us at the shelter, but in an ideal world we’d have a cadre of volunteers to follow up with those whose intake we had to deny for one reason or another, which is usually simply “space.” Of course, my fellow volunteer board members and I wish we had enough people to foster every animal, but barring that, I asked the staff several months ago to start documenting the “denied intakes.” I know it’s more work, but the data has been very useful to see, as usually we would only get reports of the animals we were able to take in. I periodically review the ones that we had to deny and will sometimes email the person who inquired to make sure that the resources we gave them were helpful. More times than not, it was insufficient. I then sometimes start to worry about what the disposition of the animals will be. Well, today was another success story! I found out that two pomchi (Pomeranian-Chihuahua) puppies needed to be rehomed because of a severe allergy in the family, and that they had originally come from an unhoused woman who was unable to take care of them. I always maintain that some unhoused people are fantastic pet parents, but newborn puppies have very special vaccination needs and costs, of course. The people who brought the puppies were wonderful and so grateful that Shea and I would take them at least for now, and we were all grateful that they were Parvo negative, as that can be deadly to puppies. With the herculean effort of the staff at HSNB and some of the board and other volunteers, we were able to process these gorgeous puppies, and at the last minute, one of our regular rescue partners, Underdog, which does nothing but fostering, came through! That was helpful because Shea and I already have 5 dogs at home, including three fosters, which includes a sort of high-maintenance senior right now. However, my heart panged when I heard that they were Pomchi’s because of the relationship I had with my own Pomchi Timber for so many years. That’s an incredible story in and of itself. Shea was so sweet with these babies in their papoose and would have gladly brought them home with us, but fortunately we had another volunteer step up.
For Mom’s 83rd Birthday
My mother died when she was only 73. Today would have been her 83rd birthday. I can’t believe ovarian cancer took her so quickly in 2016. FUCK CANCER. Through the magic of artificial intelligence, last night I was playing around with her pictures. I consider myself the family archivist, having digitized all photos from multiple generations long before my house fire, of course. My sister said this is her favorite picture of my parents, taken a few months before my dad died in 1990. He also died young, predeceasing one of his parents, as my mom did.
Well, I almost fell on the floor when I heard my mother audibly LAUGH in the AI-generated video of her on that swing:
20251207 Double Sunday Row
Greatly magnified, one can see in the lower left that there was a sea lion on the rocks in Glen Cove today when we were rowing. This is above and beyond the dozen or so times a sea lion popped up and was within a few hundred yards of us during the first row today.
We mistakenly thought that these would be the last rows of the year, but we are hopefully rowing next week, weather permitting.
I’m barely in this video. In the foreground, you’ll see a fuzzy hat, which is my head as I prepare the whaleboat for going out.
The first row on Sunday morning was not dangerously foggy. We’ve had to cancel only a few times due to extreme fog. More often, we cancel because of higher-than-safe winds. Today was also windy and cold, but slightly warmer than yesterday. However, it is still worth getting up at 5:30am on a weekend for the privilege of doing this all year round!
Scott was our coxswain in training today and was taking his test for certification! It’s exciting to know we’ll have another coxswain available to take us out regularly, and I know he did well!











































































































